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Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning? A: Shoot him before he hits the water.

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Kawał z dnia 2018-06-22

What do you call a lawyer who doesn`t know the law? A judge.

Kawał z dnia 2018-06-21

An F-111 was flying escort with a B-52 and generally making a nuisance of himself by flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The message for the B-52 crew was: - `Anything you can do, I can do better.` Not to be outdone, the bomber pilot announced that he would rise to the challenge. The B-52 continued its flight, straight and level, however. Perplexed, the fighter pilot asked: - `So? What did you do?` - `We just shut down two engines.`

Kawał z dnia 2018-06-20

During the Persian Gulf War, I was assigned to go to Saudi Arabia. As I was saying good-bye to my family, my three-year-old son, Christopher, was holding on to my leg and pleading with me not to leave. - `No, Daddy, please don`t go!` he kept repeating. We were beginning to make a scene when my wife, desperate to calm him, said: - `Let Daddy go and I`ll take you to get a pizza.` Immediately, Christopher loosened his death grip, stepped back and in a calm voice said - `Bye, Daddy.`